bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
