No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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