Don't make out with my wife yet
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize