1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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