grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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