so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Randomize
