i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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