I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
