do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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