This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize