He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
they're like a gay fantastic four
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
