I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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