Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
