last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
