3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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