i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
