I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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