between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
