Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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