i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
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I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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