somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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