i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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