haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
