Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize