The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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