If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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