please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
