I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
