420 ftw
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize
