just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
