am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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