I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
True strength comes from lack of pants
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
