Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
