You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
