Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
