somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
