I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
