I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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