My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
