Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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