i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
