theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize