But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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