yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize