i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Just invented taco cereal.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
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