just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
