Your tits are I can't wait for
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
