hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
