take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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