its not stalking. its research.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
