Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
