did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
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