Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
